Growing up, I was surrounded by peaceful natural births and had only experienced homebirths. My sister even became a midwife~ Although, the thought of childbirth in general terrified me and was the last thing I wanted to "experience". I had developed a strong FEAR (notice the capital letters). It wasn't until I became pregnant with my first child that I immediately felt that fear turn into peace. It's almost as if God granted me the ability to enjoy my pregnancy without fear and lifted that heavy cloud that had consumed me for so many years. I researched my options and talked it over with my husband, who did not agree with homebirths. I wasn't quite sure what I wanted, so agreed on a hospital birth with a midwife. Next, I fell in love with the Hypnobirthing technique and decided to take the course and start practicing. Hypnobirthing relies heavily on releasing all fears and becoming completely relaxed in all aspects of my pregnancy and childbirth. I have always been very fearful of hospitals and struggled with the idea of how I could labor comfortably in an atmosphere that I was completely uncomfortable. So, at week 35 I changed my mind and decided to have a birth center birth with our same midwife in her birth center. My husband agreed that he would be nervous either way, but wanted me to be comfortable and safe.
Six days past my due date, I woke early in the morning with a strong contraction and went to my exercise ball to sit and relax. Almost as soon as I sat, I heard a loud pop and knew it wasn't the ball.....my water had broke. Contractions started shortly after that and within an hour the contractions were 2-3 minutes apart. How could this be?? Weren't they suppose to start gradually?? I could feel the fear setting in as we started the hour drive to our birth center. We stopped at my parent's half way and didn't stay as long as planned....things were happening much too quickly and I was getting nervous. My sister drove me the rest of the way, which helped me let go of my fear and just go with what was happening. I started focusing on each contraction rather than worrying about all the "what if's" and didn't make a sound, just breathed. Soon, my body changed and I knew something was different. I looked to see where we were (still about 15 minutes away) and told my sister "I think I'm pushing". She assured me I would know and told me not to worry that it was all part of the process. With the next contraction, I was uncontrollably pushing and told her to step on it. We surprised the birth center as we ran in ready to go with nothing set up.....they quickly ran around making me more nervous just watching them. And soon, we met our beautiful son. The whole process was fast, furious, and absolutely breath taking.
I felt so blessed to have experienced a peaceful and natural birth. But, immediately began to think back to how many people I encountered while I was pregnant that had to share their "horror" story with me. Some of my funniest moments were the expressions I received when telling people my plan to birth naturally in a birth center. Why is our society's view on birth so distorted?? Did I get lucky, or is there something behind this? I soon realized that our country has an epidemic of bad birth stories and high rates of intervention. Thus, my motivation for being pro active in changing this view point in our society. If not for the babies, but also for the mothers who strongly desire a birthing experience to cherish not dwell on.
I hope this blog can help those looking for confirmation, assurance, and confidence in their desired birthing experience. So that next time you encounter one of those "stories", you can smile then turn and remind yourself that this is NOT how your experience will be!! You have the power to choose your experience by the way you perceive it, so that even if the worst occurs, you can still feel empowered and positive knowing that you've just experienced one of the most life changing events you'll ever experience and can be proud to be a woman!!
